Weber Workshops has revealed quite a set of stones, and they are for sale.
The latest product by the high-end coffee grinders and accessories maker launched late last week is the SG-1, a 40-kilogram set of antique Japanese querns (mill stones).
The limited run of exactly one set of centuries-old, manually turned stones came on April Fool’s Day, but it’s also real. It is actually for sale on the Weber Workshops website for $54,749.
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The brand went all-in with a genuine product page, complete with a promotional video and full description of the features and specs of the forearm-enhancing device that works safely anywhere in the world, given that it “predates CE and UL certifications by several hundred years.”
Plenty of other companies also threw their jester hats into the April Fools Day ring over the weekend, with many maintaining the coffee industry’s springtime tradition of gross food jokes.
Here are some of the top coffee stories from April 1, 2023:
Lantern Coffee Bar Flamin’ Cheeto Latte
It’s one thing to joke about offering a Flamin’ Cheeto Latte; yet it’s a whole other level of April foolery to mess around and actually make one. Lantern Coffee Bar (Instagram) in Grand Rapids, Michigan, went and did the latter, whipping up one gallon of Cheeto-infused milk to produce the one-day-only signature drink:
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Rook Buffalo Cold Brew
Beloved New Jersey-based coffee chain Rook Coffee got nasty and teased a bottled Buffalo Cold Brew:
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The Fellow Fro-Yopus Blender Attachment
Fellow, the maker of Stagg kettles as well as the Ode and Opus brew grinders, applied its signature aesthetic touches to the Fro-Yopus, a new blender attachment for its “conical brrrr grinder.”
Said Fellow, “Boasting .64 Nm of torque, it can pulverize the toughest stalks of kale and the most resilient frozen bananas.”
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Carabello Coffee Iced Americano Bath
Northern Kentucky-based roaster and retailer Carabello Coffee and its founder Justin Carabello drove functional coffee to new depths this year, introducing the Iced Americano Bath.
“Now you can reduce inflammation, relieve sore muscles, lower your body’s core temperature and boost your immune system while you simultaneously reduce your risks of Alzheimers, Type 2 Diabetes, Strokes and more, not to say anything of the energy enhancements that caffeine rich coffee provide to your brain and mood,” the company said. “Upgrade with our Oat Milk Enhancement and indulge your skin with the soothing properties of oat as you soak or our custom glass tumbler and straw enhancement which allows you indulge in your americano while you are immersed.”
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The Aillio Longshot Roaster
Roasting equipment maker Aillio introduced The Longshot, an elongated, 3-kilo-capacity version of its signature Bullet model roaster.
Said Aillio, “We named it Longshot as this relates both to the shape and the original Bullet name, and also because we have no idea whether it actually works.
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Eau de Flash Coffee
The Singapore business of international quick-service coffee chain Flash Coffee introduced Eau de Flash perfume.
“Bask in the perfect blend of zesty citrus top notes and aromatic lingering coffee heart notes, creating an invigorating scent that gets you pumped to take on the day,” the company said. “As the fragrance settles, the base notes of oud and tonka leaves a warm, woody finish.”
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Acaia Zero Gravity Pyxis Scale
Coffee accessories maker Acaia launched the Pyxis, a weightless scale.
“We’ve made a few exciting adjustments to our smallest scale to make it go from ultralight to lighter than a feather,” the company said. “We will warn all new out-of-this-world users to make sure to lock it down so it doesn’t float off to a galaxy far, far away.”
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