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Planning for an Emergency Long-Term Survival Event? Don’t Forget Coffee!


Whichever hostile government takeover, zombie raid or other armageddon-type event you may be planning for, there’s a coffee for that.

Salt Lake City, Utah-based My Patriot Supply — which specializes in short- and long-term survival items like water filtration systems, heirloom seeds, “Granny’s Homemade” dehydrated soup and “stove in a can” — has introduced Franklin’s Finest coffee. The company says the coffee, available in 720-serving orders, has a “true” shelf-life of up to 25 years. Details on the coffee are a little shady. Says My Patriot Supply:

Our survival coffee is freeze dried fresh straight from the tree to our packaging to retain the highest shelf life and flavor. 100% Pure, 100% Non-GMO, 100% Colombian.

(related: Swiss Company Feels Real Bad for Putting Hitler on Its Coffee Creamers)

We can only hope the coffee was processed, washed, dried, milled, roasted and ground as part of the tree-to-freeze-dried-package process, but that’s not really the point. You’re going to want coffee, any coffee, when you’re fighting for survival in the barren wasteland of the future.

“Not only is it the first of its kind on the market but who wouldn’t want to have coffee in a survival situation? Our packages are the perfect size for individuals, families or to barter or trade with,” says My Patriot Supply Founder Matt Redhawk. “Coffee is one of those items that people were missing from their stockpiles and is invaluable as a barter item in a crisis.”

(related: Village Voice Employees Walk Out, Demand Better Coffee)

Franklin’s Finest references Benjamin Franklin, who famously once stated the following (or something quite like it):

“Among the numerous luxuries of the table…coffee may be considered as one of the most valuable. It excites cheerfulness without intoxication; and the pleasing flow of spirits which it occasions…is never followed by sadness, languor, or debility.”

Cheerfulness without intoxication is critical in any sad, languishing and debilitating long-term survival situation, so we’re with Ben: Drink more coffee.


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